So, I might have said a few harsh words during my 20 minute rant about why Sarah Krugg will never go back to St. Cloud.
You can all laugh at me later, if she does.
I thought about “disappearing” this episode, but honesty compels me to post it.
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Honestly while I would love to see more Sarah I agree that the narrative arc for her is basically done. She has found her place (generally) for now, I see her probably eventually being a ships cook having worked her way up but still acting as ships shaman until she eventually goes ashore someplace and continues as such wherever she ends up.
Interesting to follow the musings … Sarah cannot go back to St Cloud. She has become a very different person from the woman who left, a woman who was betrayed by her culture and specifically by her father, who was willing to sacrifice her physical, mental and emotional well being in order to follow social norms. Otto forfeited any right he may have had to a relationship with her. That said, I don’t think assigning Sarah her place in the universe as a ship’s cook is sufficient. At this point in her life she needs to heal and find her own self worth. Working as a cook gives her a safe place to find her balance. She may find that is enough for a happy and satisfying life. On the other hand, she may well outgrow that niche and explore the shamanism more fully. Let her have room to change and then move on if appropriate. Going back to St Cloud even for a visit would be hurtful since those who had stayed would expect her to be someone she used to be, not the person she has become. She has the right and the necessity to move on in her life when and if she is ready. That should not include St Cloud, since that is now someone else’s story not hers. Give Sarah time and there may be another story there for her. Maybe it’s exciting enough for another novel, maybe it’s just a gently happy good life.
Ultimately this is Nathan’s decision, and I respect whatever choice he makes, as any choice is plausible: Sarah could choose to never return, but she could also choose to heal, and strengthen to the point where she is able to return to St. Cloud for a visit or otherwise, to find closure and forgiveness. A Hawaiian kahuna and teacher once powerfully said, “there are two kinds of forgiveness: now, or later. The second causes pain.” While Otto made some grave errors that contributed to Sarah’s horrific experience, he was depicted by Nathan, all the way through, as truly caring and loving, and had good intentions. The choice to marry Bobby was clearly depicted as Sarah’s choice, despite the warnings. Otto was not depicted as having pressured her to do so.
So, I take a softer lens to it all. Yes, Sarah needed to escape, and I was relieved when she did so. She has reason to be angry with her father. But there is no reason there can’t be forgiveness and healing, which regardless of where Sarah lives out her days, I think many who have a soft spot for both of these fragile characters would like to witness.
I thought she might go back to get some wood and shells for carving. I know she loves crocheting but her first love was carving. At some level she must miss that. Letting Otto know she’s alright. In her own way, she would be the shaman on whatever ship she was on.